Saturday, July 30, 2011

BOBBEE BEE: THESE ARE THE WARNING SIGNS!! DON'T DO DRUGS

BOBBEE BEE: THESE ARE THE WARNING SIGNS
1. Changing on the Inside:
I start to feel bad, but I can't figure out what's going wrong.
2. Lying to Myself:
I feel bad. I try to make the bad feeling go away by telling myself that everything's OK, when I know it really isn't. Sometimes I believe My own lies and feel better for a little while. At other times, I know I'm lying, and I feel guilty about it. At still other times I'm confused and I can't tell whether I'm lying to myself or telling the truth.
3. Looking Good to Others:
I want to look good to others, so I hold back on what I'm really thinking or feeling. I start lying and covering up, instead of telling the truth and taking a chance on looking bad. I start playing a role that I think other people will like and accept.


4. Feeling Like No One Wants to Be My Friend:
I want to fit in and have an exciting social life and a lot of good friends, but being clean and sober starts to get in the way.
5. Feeling Romantically Undesirable:

I want to have exciting romantic relationships but I start to feel like this will never happen because I can't drink or use drugs. I start holding back when I'm around people I'm attracted to.

n style="color: #cc33cc;">6. Convincing Myself That Adults Can't Help Me

I convince myself that my parents, counselors, and teachers don't really understand me. I stop paying attention to what they're telling me. I start to believe that I'm smarter than they are.
7. Staying Away from Friends Who Can Help I avoid people who will force me to be honest with myself, and this means staying away from my friends who are clean and sober.
8. Hanging Out With Old Friends Who Can't Help
I feel like being witha my old friends who are drinking and drugging. I convince myself that I can have a good time with them and get my mind off things. They seem to understand and support me. It seems like nobody else does. 9. Feeling Bad That I Can't Party
10. Getting Complusive

I start using complusive behaviors to keep my mind off how uncomfortable I am. Maybe I watch too much TV, I eat too much, gain weight, and then starve myself to try and lose it. Maybe I drink too much coffee or too many soft drinks with caffeine in them. Maybe I smoke too many cigarettes. If I'm into sports, I practice too hard and train too much. If I'm into music, I practice my instrument to lose myself and my problems in my music
11. Acting Out:
I start doing some things that I'm not supposed to be doing but I cover it up and get away with it. This gives me the courage to break bigger rules and to take bigger risks.



12. Crisis Building
Things keep going wrong, I overreact to or mismanage each problem



13. Getting Defensive
When people point out problems that don't want to see, I get defensive, scared, and angry. I blame them for making me feel bad.
14. Avoiding Family Members:
I stop doing things with my family members. I make excuses to stay away from my mother, father, brothers, sisters and other family members. I stop eating meals with my family. I refuse to go to family gatherings. I don't want to get involved in family parties.

15. Getting Lonely:
I start spending more time alone. I usually have good reasons and excuses for staying away from other people.

16. Getting Depressed:
I get so depressed that I can't do the things I normally do. I feel life isn't worth living, and sometimes I think about killing myself or relapsing as a way to end the depression. I stop eating right. I can't get started or get anything done.


17. Getting Immobilized:
I can't seem to get started or make myself do what I know I need to do. I stop following a daily routine.

18. Losing Control
I start doing things that violate my values, hurt me, and hurt those I love. As a result, I start losing respect for myself. I find excuses to miss counseling and self-help group meetings. I cut classes and push other people away by ignoring them, getting angry with them, criticizing them, or putting them down. I get so isolated that it seems like there's no one I can turn to for help. I start to feel sorry for myself and use self-pity to get attention. I feel ashamed and guilty. I know that I'm out of control, but I keep lying, using denial, and making excuses for my behavior. I feel trapped by the pain and start to believe that I'll never be able to manage my life. I see only three possible ways out-insanity, suicide or relapse.
19. Thinking about Relapse:
I want to escape, I start to think that having a relapse will help me solve my problems and feel better. Things seem so bad that I start to think I might as well relapse because things couldn't get worse. I try to convince myself that I can use alcohol and drugs socially without losing control or having serious problems

20. Relapse
I try to solve my problems and feel better by using alcohol or drugs. Although I rationalize my behavior, deep inside I know that alcohol and drugs won't work and will hurt me in the long run. I start using and try to control my behavior. I feel myself losing control and get disappointed because the alcohol and drugs aren't doing for me what I thought they would. My relapse spirals out of control, creating serious problems with my life and health. The problems keep getting worse until I realize that I need help and decide to try recovery one more time.
Developed by Terence T.Gorski: The Adolescent Relapse Warning Sign List

Monday, July 18, 2011

BOBBEE BEE'S QUEST FOR HAPPINESS


The Happiness Quest
by Michelle Burford

Inhale, exhale

Get cozy in a comfortable chair, close your eyes, and breathe in through your nose for five seconds, then slowly exhale through your mouth. Can't spare the full 15 minutes? Just five minutes of intentional breathing is enough to release tension from our bodies and lower blood pressure.
Savor other people's happiness

"Happiness is contagious," says Lama Choyin Rangdrol, an African-American teacher of Tibetan Buddhism. "Celebrate other people's joy and accomplishments as though they are your own. Join the party of happiness as a way of jump-starting and maintaining your own happiness."

Turn off the small screen


Your television is one of the biggest joy stealers. A 2008 University of Maryland study showed that the unhapppiest people watch six or more hours of television each day. Not only does the barrage of advertising leave you yearning for things you don't have, but the time spent cradling the remote robs you of simple everyday experiences that can tip your happy meter. Instead of sitting on the sofa watching other folks having fun, go out and find your own. Even an activity as simple as putting on your shoes ande going for an afternoon stroll is a step in the right direction. Even better, take a class in something you love or join a group that will force you to engage in an enjoyable activity outside your home consistently.

Forget the gym, head for the outdoors

A good mood may be only minutes away, but you're going to have to leave the house to get it. According to researchers at England's University of Essex, light exercise done in a natural environment such as a park, outside by a lake or even in the backyard-elevated both mood and self-esteem in participants. The best news? You don't need to work out for hours to reap the rewards.


Give what you can
When you're broke, it might seem counterintutive that offering a hand-or even a couple of dollars-can lift your spirits.

Retreat
Stepping away from your everyday can help you gain perspective by giving you the me time you need to relax and refocus. Think quiet countrysides or serene beaches, not clubs and bars. The idea is to be in a place that allows you to tune in to yourself. Can't manage to swing the next flight to Jamaica? Take a day off from work for a home retreat. "Carve out a period to do absolutely nothing."
Star in your own music video

Go a head and pump up the volume, preferably while using your hairbrush as a mic or belting out your best shower solo. Better yet-get up and dance. Whether you choose to Zumba or simpyly to bust a move in your living room, you'll experience an immediate lift. That's because activities like singing and dancing power up your mood by boosting the level of the feel good hormone serotonin in your brain.



Declare your love

Experts say the single greatest predictor of joy is also one of the simplest: building and maintaining strong bonds with family and friends. Call up three people and tell them how much you love them, then go ahead and explain exactly what you so enjoy about their presence in your life.


Pray

That's right. You can pray yourself happy. According to 2006 Pew Research report, a spiritual practice even an occasional one, can reset your mood. When we surrender our problems to a higher power, we free ourselves from an enormous emotional weight.

Pack your personal happiness kit
"You know that you're going to hava a down day at some point," says Bonnie St.John's, author of How Strong Women Pray and Live Your Joy. "Why not prepare a first aid kit for your emotions? Fill a box or a bag with things that you know will cheer you up."

Squeeze in your Z's
"Tired people are unhappy people." says professor and clinical psychologist Dr.Angela Neil-Barnett of Kent State University in Kent, Ohio. "A lack of sleep places individuals at higher risk for depression and anxiety." So make sure you get eight to nine hours of shut-eye each night. For tips visit http://www.sleepbetter.org/

Create thinking space

When you finally take on that mile-high stack of papers you've been avoiding, your sense of accomplishment will send up the needle on you joy-o-meter. Set an alarm to do just five minutes of work at a time. For decluttering ideas browse www.flylady.net

Do only the next necessary thing
Some of our unhappiness from reviewing events we can't go back and fix, or worrying about what might befall us next year. Stop bracing for the worst and just do what is in front of you today. As writer Mark Twain once noted: "I've lived through some terrible things in my life-some of which actually happened."


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